I struggle to understand people, that’s not poetry, it’s a simple fact,
My actions are built upon a framework, steps to accomplish a given task,
I’m not a robot, I’m just focused, But when others act without purpose,
I confess to feeling robotic and my understanding less than earnest.
For example, I have an old friend with plans to STREAM for a living,
A charming, casual online positive video gamer making a killin’.
I want to support him, be a friend, don’t act antagonistic,
“I don’t want to be famous,” he says, “I’m being realistic.”
But if that’s the case, then I don’t really get it.
In an era of self-promotion, isn’t that “reality” kind of bullshit?
So I did some research, made up a screenname,
Joined the stream of a VTuber of middling fame,
Who shared her thoughts over a chat with two thousand viewers,
Whose ceaselessly interrupted us with emotes and heart stickers,
She explained kindly that the times are fun and the money’s good,
But wants to cut back on the streaming, she really thinks she should,
To find an authentic meaning with the people around her,
Rather than appealing to these internet strangers,
So she says with her cute anime avatar and quick, snarky wit,
Having long left behind the anxiety of coming up with new hits,
But I’m still left curious. Why bother at all?
Is it just to pass the time, await the curtain call?
And yes, I see the irony in a blog’s commentary about internet popularity,
But this place is for me, ultimately – you’re just visiting,
A person talking in a box for either no audience or to a thousand faceless fans,
Curating “creator content” into an apathetic void, well, seems a morbid plan.